Joke Machine Empire

Best Jokes in the World and Home to 72 Welker Jokes

  1. Wes Welker
  2. How is Welker straight- he drops a lot of balls
  3. Why can't Welker stay in the same class- he drops them
  4. Why does Welker love Nestle- they have Butterfingers
  5. Why does Welker want to stay single- he doesn't want to wear a ring
  6. What's the difference between Welker and Bill Buckner- Buckner puts in effort
  7. Why does Welker idolize Doug Flutie- he can drop kick
  8. What did Welker do with his math class- he dropped it
  9. Why is Welker bad at golf- he always has to take a drop
  10. Why does Welker like New Year's Eve- he gets to see another ball drop
  11. Why does Welker love Brady's toilet- that's where his career is
  12. Why does Welker get into trouble in school- he gets the slips
  13. Why did Welker lose the Super Bowl- he's not a Giant
  14. Why does Welker like blue- because he blue it
  15. Why was Welker rushed to the hospital after the Super Bowl- he choked
  16. Why is Welker frustrated after fishing- he can't catch anything
  17. Why is Welker never sick- he can't catch a cold
  18. Why does Welker love the science lab- they have droppers
  19. Why does Welker love tools- he screws us
  20. What does Welker do to a party- he drops in
  21. What does Welker do when he's shocked- his jaw drops
  22. Why does Welker want to play football in Europe- you can't use hands
  23. What's Welker's favorite part on a roller coaster- the drop
  24. Why doesn't Welker have hands- Miss Hooters gave him wings
  25. Why does Welker check the wind before every game- he wants to see if something else can blow it
  26. Why did Welker go to the movies- he couldn't make the play
  27. Why is Welker a good vacuum- he sucks
  28. Why does Welker get more gifts at Christmas- he's a receiver 
  29. Why can't Welker go on the monkey bars- he can't hang on
  30. Why does Welker like the Sahara- there is only a drop of water
  31. What's Welker's favorite expression- look ma no hands
  32. Why is Welker bad at hang gliding- he can't hang on
  33. Why does Welker work at UPS- he drops everything off
  34. What's Welker's worst sport, besides football- handball
  35. What's Welker's favorite part about math- when you drop a number
  36. What's Welker's favorite part about the rain- the raindrops
  37. Why does Welker like the Red Sox- they choke too
  38. Why is Welker okay with stains- he only gets a drop
  39. Why isn't Welker good in the clutch- he can't hand-le it
  40. Why doesn't Welker pick his kids up at school- he only drops them off
  41. Why is Welker a bad lawyer- he drops the charges

Baseball

1. What did the Red Sox fan get at the Yankees Bar- Boos

2. The Boston Red Sox

3. Why do fashion fanatics hate baseball- they play on a diamond

4. What is the heaviest pitch to throw to a batter- a heater

5. Why does the bargain shopper love little league- there are many steals

6. Who is the idiot in Kansas City- the Royal fool

7. What is the worst type of baseball player- one on the Red Sox

8. Why was the Marlins player exited- he saw a fan

9. What did the baseball player wear in the winter- a glove

10. Why are Red Sox pitchers cowards- they are chicken

11. Why are baseball players from Tampa good dancers- they can Rays the roof

12. Why can't Red Sox pitchers see the plate- they have Popeyes

13. Where do catchers eat- over the plate

14. What league do cows play baseball in- the farm league

15. What's a frogs favorite play in baseball- the flies

16. What's a baseball players favorite playground toy on the way to 2nd- the slide

17. What do you say to Sammy Sosa to shut him up- put a cork in it

Basketball

1. What NCAA team serves the rich- Butler

2. Why did the judge go to the basketball game- to check on the court

3. What do you call the Heat for making it to the Finals- lucky

4. Where do the Nuggets play their home games- at the food court

5. Where couldn't the circle sit in the TD Garden- in the box seats

6. Why does VCU bring pillows to the NCAA tournament- they are the sleepers

7. What was the result of Michael Jackson's basketball game- it was a thriller

8. When is a donut good at basketball- when its Dunkin'

9. Why can't the state of North Carolina move- it has tar heels

10. Why can't Jeremy Lin make lay ups- he can't drive

11. Why is Kobe Bryant the only Laker to go backstage- no one else gets a pass

12. Where do diamonds play basketball- in quatrz 

13. Why does Kobe Bryant fail his classes- he can't pass

14. Where does beef jerkey play basketball- in a slim gym

Football

1. How was Terrel Owens poor in Dallas- he wined about his quarterback

2. What made Bill Belichick laugh- my jokes

3. What appliance is the world's biggest hero- the super bowl

4. Where does Gillette Stadium live- in a field house

5. Why couldn't the play go on in Pittsburgh- they couldn't move the steel curtain 

6. the Colts

7. Why can some wide receivers afford to make mistakes- some are white outs

8. Why did Joe Pa lose his job- the AD's were lion

9. See Welker Page

10. Why did the coach put the kicker in the freezer- he wanted to ice the kicker

11. What paper towels do the Saints use- Bounty

12. What does Rob Gronkowski do with his hair- he spikes it

13. What's Kentucky's favorite football formation- the wildcat 

14. What's Jacksonville's favorite car brand- Jaguar 

15. What is the fattest football team- the Giants

16. Why doesn't Tim Tebow fly Delta- he only flies Virgin

17. Why does Tim Tebow like to rush for touchdowns- so he can cross the goal line

18. What does Peyton Manning throw in Denver- a rocky mountain pass

19. What NFL team does William play for- the Bills

20. How do the Colts win games- with Luck

21. Why did the Pats fan speed to the game- he wanted a ticket

22. What did the replacement refs buy the Ravens at Wendys- a W

23. What did the replacement ref do at the eye doctors- left

24. Why do replacement refs whistle on the phone- so the call is blown

25. Why do the replacement refs have a high text bill- they don't make calls

26. Why are the replacement refs tatle tales- they're whistle blowers

27. What do you call a game with replacement refs- un-official

28. How many hours a week do the replacement refs work- none

29. What do the replacement refs have in common with Welker- they both blow

30. What do replacement refs have over their windows- a blind

31. The replacement refs

32. Why did Tim Tebow get written up in the hall- he didn't have a good pass

33. Where do quarterbacks put their wallets- in the pocket

34. Where do Michael Stahan's teeth go shopping- at the GAP

35. What did Tom Brady do on the track- he made a pass

Hockey

1. What is a goalie's favorite cereal brand- Post

2. What's a hockey players favorite drink- penal-tea

3. What hockey team loves beer- the Boston Brewin's

4. How come people in Vancouver are so funny- they're a riot

5. Why do goalies get burned- everyone takes shots at them

6. Why were there many grandparents at the college hockey game- it was senior night

7. Why did the slut go to the penalty box- she got caught for hooking

8. Why do vampires like the NHL- the overtime is sudden death

9. How does a hockey player pay for something- with a check

10. Why does Alex Burrows like steak- he likes to bite it

11. When are hockey players good magicians- when they have a hat trick

12. What is the most popular team on a plane- the Flyers

13. Why was Ward arrested after the game- he shot the puck 

14. What is the coolest penalty in hockey- trippin'

15. What did the doctor give Zdeno Chara- a shot

16. Why are hockey players whimps- they don't use any balls

17. When do hockey players study their penalties- when it is a major

Other

1. What food loves chess- a chestnut

2. What appliance loves sports- a fan

3. What truck is a ball- a DODGE ball

4. What does a golfer do on the weekends- PARty

5. How does a golfer get to the course- with a driver

6. Why does the wind stink at sports- it blows

7. Who lives in the workout room- Gym

8. Why does a carnivore love track- it has meats

9. What is a carpet's favorite sport- RUGby

10. What high schooler is great at sports- a pro-teen

11. Why is a card good at poker- it knows when to fold

12. Why do boxers like JME jokes- they're a hit

13. How do you start a fire at Wimbledon- with a tennis match

14. Why do soccer players like clubs on cards- they don't want a red card

15. Why does the fitness instructor stay outside on the job- he works out

16. What's Mike Tyson's favorite card game- spit

17. When do cards dress up- when they're in different suits

18. What measure takes an early lead in a race- the liter

19. How do atoms go surfing- they catch a micro wave

20. Why are scissors bad at sports- they always get cut

21. How did Michael Phelps break a table- he dove on a pool table

22. What do you call a good looking track- aTRACtive

23. Why did Bin Laden like soccer- they have shootouts

24. Why is the ocean such an avid sports fan- it  always does the wave

25. Why do golfers often end up in jail- they shoot their scores

26. How do soccer players react to JME jokes- they get a kick out of it

27. Why did the skater go to the hospital- his moves were sick

28. Why did the trainer go to the liquor store- he wanted a six-pack

29. What did the skier get for her wedding- a black diamond

30. Why are quarterbacks on Broadway- they make plays

31. Why does no other driver mess with Carl Edwards- he'll flip

32. Why did Juan Pablo Montoya crash into the jet dryer- he was the target

33. Why isn't Danica Patrick good at public speaking- she's a wreck

34. Why isn't Danica Patrick's website any good- it always crashes

35. Why was the poker player fat- he had too many chips

36. What's a bowlers favorite part about baseball- the strikes

37. What's a cheerleader's favorite airline- Spirit

38. Why do dancers always divorce their husbands- they can split

39. Why does Brad Keslowski poop during a race- he takes the number 2

40. Why did the horse at the Kentucky Derby finish 3rd- he was watching the show

41. What does Kyle Busch have for breakfast- a donut

42. What is the most flexible weed- a tumble weed

43. Who does Hugh Hefner golf with- a foresome

44. How do janitors win a series- with a sweep

45. What kind of injuries do soccer players get- real ones

46. Why do soccer players act- they're in a play

47. How does Billy Mays determine the site of a soccer game- with his pitch

48. When are Lay's exited about a golf shot- when its a chip

49. Why is bigfoot good at sports- he's a legand

50. What do golf cups wear on their jackets- a pin

51. How do volleyball players celebrate a touchdown- with a spike

52. Where do NASCARs make burgers- on the grill

53. What part of a NASCAR tells the end of every race- the spoiler

54. What car can tell a good joke- a funny car